


A Mental Thing Or Something

by Quaggy



Category: The West Wing
Genre: Do not take this fic too seriously!, F/M, or seriously at all
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-01
Updated: 2016-03-01
Packaged: 2018-05-24 02:37:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,080
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6138463
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Quaggy/pseuds/Quaggy
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Josh is worried that he might be loosing it. Leo knows that he's already lost it.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Mental Thing Or Something

**Author's Note:**

> First posted August 5, 2006. This was originally part of a much longer work that I wrote with a friend. The piece was a post-ep for _Artic Radar_ , but I think this conversation works well on its own. It also happens to be my favorite bit of the parts I had contributed. So that works out nicely too.

It had been a relatively quiet morning. Nothing too unusual had developed and Leo was starting to believe that they could actually make it though a day without someone doing something that would make him want to drag out a baseball bat. But then Josh appeared at his door with a look on his face that dispelled that delusion.  
  
“Leo? You got a minute?”  
  
“Yeah. What do you want?”  
  
Josh didn’t answer, but carefully shut the door behind him. Then he crossed over to Margaret’s door… and after a moment’s hesitation, locked it.  
  
“Josh..?” Leo questioned, his eyebrows raised high on his forehead.  
  
Josh, wandering around the room, didn’t respond right away.  
  
“Okay… Either something is wrong with me or… well… something’s just wrong!”  
  
“Josh, we all know that something’s wrong with you.”  
  
“No. I mean, I may be having hallucinations… which could mean a mental… thing or something.”  
  
“Josh, could you please get to the point like a normal person?”  
  
“Ok, so last night Donna went out on a date with Jack Reece...”  
  
“Josh, is this is going to be one of those idiotic conversations than make me wish for an international crisis just so I can get away?”  
  
“Probably.”  
  
Josh stopped pacing and looked directly at his boss. With a sigh, Leo waved his hand and Josh resumed prowling around his office.  
  
"So, she goes out on this date and everything is normal, right? See... the thing is... I could have _sworn_ that Donna showed up at my place wearing cow pajamas at a ridiculously early hour this morning! I mean... I know she did... At least I think, she did... Except she's acting totally normal... She didn't even flinch when I mentioned dancing cows in passing! Do you know how hard it was to find a casual way to mention dancing cows?!  
  
“Wait... Please tell me you did not just say that Donna was wearing cow pajamas. I could have lived a happy life not knowing that.”  
  
“I think... Leo... Could this all be in my head?”  
  
“Quite probably.”  
  
“Have I finally snapped?”  
  
“Again, quite probably. You haven't been drinking, have you?”  
  
“ _No!_ There was nothing remotely mind altering in my body... as far as I know. I don't even think I was asleep yet! Well, I guess I could have been... I could have dreamed all that. But I’m sure I wasn’t asleep. I think.”  
  
“Josh, let me see if I can recap, in an attempt to bring a speedy end to this very painful conversation. Donna showed up at your place at an ungodly hour wearing cow pajamas. Right?”  
  
“Yes. They had little tutus on and everything.”  
  
“Oh, for the love of God... Spare me the details. Please. So, she showed up, you went to bed together and now she’s acting like nothing happened.”  
  
“Right. Wait! No! We didn’t... No!!!”  
  
“So nothing happened other than Donna showing up at your apartment?”  
  
“Umm...”  
  
“Josh, just tell me what happened, okay?”  
  
“Well... she... I mean, I... we kissed. I think.”  
  
“You think? You don’t know?”  
  
“Yes. I mean, no. I mean, yes, we did. Unless, it’s all one big hallucination because I’m having a brain... thing.”  
  
“Keep this up, Josh, and I'm going to be the one with the brain thing! Okay, let’s just assume that you’re not troubled by some sort of mental impairment. Though the jury’s still out on that one. What's the problem?”  
  
“I mean... she's not acting like she remembers any of this at all!”  
  
“And I take it you don’t think that’s a good thing?”  
  
Josh collapsed into a chair beside Leo’s desk.  
  
“I just figured that if we ever kissed it would be something worth remembering.”  
  
“Finally!” Leo shouted as he threw hands into the air.  
  
“Wh-what?”  
  
“Do you know how long I've been waiting for you to admit that?!”  
  
“Admit what? I haven't...”  
  
“Do not test my already severely strained patience.”  
  
“Yeah...” he replied, slumping down in his chair. “I like her. A lot.”  
  
“Well then. Good.” And incredibly, a grin spread across Leo’s face.  
  
“Good?”  
  
“Josh, you and Donna have a relationship built on trust and mutual respect. There is no greater foundation for a marriage. And she lives and breathes politics! Can't say either the President or I were as lucky in that regard. And understand that I'm not saying Abbey Barrington was anything less than the best thing that ever happened to Jed Bartlet!”  
  
“Umm... Don’t you think it’s a little early to be talking marriage considering I haven’t even asked her out yet?” Josh asked, a little stunned, but surprisingly calm.  
  
“No, it’s not. Because I know you and I knew Noah Lyman. Once you’ve given your heart, that’s it. And you gave her your heart a long time ago, didn’t you, son?”  
  
Josh paused and ran his hand over his face. “Yeah... but, Leo...”  
  
“Yeah?”  
  
“She's, umm... I mean... She's my assistant.”  
  
“Yeah, we're gonna have to do something about that. Would she agree to be transferred?”  
  
“I have no idea. I mean, I don't know if she... well, if she  _likes_ me. You think I should ask her?”  
  
“Oh, for God's sake, Josh, do I look like the camp counselor? Look... she showed up at your apartment wearing cow pajamas!”  
  
“Allegedly! I still say I might be having a nervous break down.”  
  
“Josh, did she show up at you apartment or not?”  
  
“Yeah... but that was to yell at me!”  
  
“You think she'd yell at you like that if she _didn't_ like you?  
  
“She yells at me all the time!”  
  
Leo was looking at him with that pissed off “how did you even figure out how to breathe?” look he usually reserved for when someone was being particularly boneheaded.  
  
“Wait... you’re saying she does it because she _likes_ me?”  
  
“Isn’t it nice that you found someone who has the same emotional maturity that you do? Just have her stop by before you leave for the day. I’ll have the papers she’ll need to sign ready to go.”  
  
Josh really had no response for that and Leo decided the novelty of seeing Josh Lyman at a loss for words was almost enough to make up for that particularly mind numbing conversation.  
  
“Are you still here?” Leo barked.  
  
“No... I mean, I’ll just be going,” Josh said as he sprang to his feet and turned to leave.  
  
“Josh!”  
  
“Yeah?”  
  
“Unlock Margaret’s door!”  
  
“Right.”  
  
It was only after Josh finally disappeared that Leo allowed himself to laugh.


End file.
